A book on goal setting

Today’s computers are much more reliable in general than the older generations. Modern hard drives fail less frequently, and they warn you well in advance about upcoming failures with the recently adopted SMART monitoring.

Modern hard disks have greater storage capacities than their predecessors. Retaining the same physical size, they feature a much higher storage density, allowing storing more files on the same space of their surface. And hence the big problem: if your hard drive fails, you have a lot to lose. Much more than you would just a few years ago, with much less chances to get your data back without precision tools and clean labs.

While there’s little you can do about a physically damaged hard drive except send it to a dedicated data recovery service, there’s still hope if hard drive failure didn’t cause it to stop spinning. Even if your disk is not accessible from Windows you can still access it with dedicated data recovery tools such as The Undelete NTFS Partition Recovery or other FAT and NTFS partition recovery tools such as
These tools used by non-professionals can often recover damaged partitions and restore the hard drive to its original condition. Is it safe to use the same drive after it failed once? Maybe, depending on the reason of the failure. If data corruption occurred because of a system crash or a power failure, your hard drive is probably unaffected and should be used without a trouble. If a badly written application caused system instability and data corruption, it’s not your drive’s fault, and you should not be concerned about its reliability.

If, however, the instability was caused by the hard drive failure, exercise extreme caution. Have a look at the drive’s SMART logs accessible from Windows Administrative Tools, save your data onto another disk and replace the faulty one. And remember, even if your hard drive is completely inaccessible, you still have a strong chance of getting your data back with data recovery tools from

Recently, I spoke with a client who wanted me to do a workshop at an upcoming conference. I offer a number of different talks, so I asked her what the focus of the meeting was in order to be able to suggest a relevant topic. She said that although the committee members had already picked several programs, they had not yet identified a focus for the conference. My first thought in response to this was, If you don’t know what you want, then how are you going to get it? However, I am savvy enough not to insult people, so we spoke a little longer and we came up with a program that she wanted me to present.

It never ceases to amaze me that people do not identify outcomes they wish to achieve. While the above example is related to a conference, it is by no means limited to that area. Many people engage in activities in their careers and businesses, but they haven’t defined what they want to attain. They are completing tasks, but they aren’t focused on accomplishing clear-cut results.

When I was a human resources executive, I often worked with people to determine the appropriate jobs that were needed in their groups. Many department heads would complete job descriptions for key jobs, which described all of the tasks that the employees would be required to do. It took a great deal of effort for me to get these individuals to realize that employees in key positions are not paid to perform tasks, they are paid to produce results. Through much coaching on my part, we were able to identify the outcomes that the individuals were expected to achieve in the various positions.

Why is it so critical to determine outcomes for a job, a meeting, a department, or any other situation? Because if you don’t know what your outcome is, the odds are that you will spend a lot of unnecessary time and money trying to reach a fuzzy target. And there is a very strong chance that the target will not even be reached. Outcomes let you know where you are going. They give you important information about how to use your resources, time, money, and employees. When you know your outcome, you can continually make important decisions is this going to help me reach my goal or will this take me further away from my objective?

Clearly defined outcomes can also be very motivating. I worked with a coaching client who had an idea about a new business that she wanted to start. When she first got the idea, she was very excited about it, however, she never took action to get the business moving. She continually came up with excuses about why she wasn’t doing anything to make the business a reality. I finally got her to sit down and write a detailed description of what the outcome was that she wanted to achieve with the business. That was the missing key. As soon as she wrote down the detailed outcome, she began to do the things that were necessary to get the business started. For her, defining the outcome spurred the action that is required in any business. Five years later, she has a very successful business that she absolutely loves.

Some people have a great deal of difficulty in trying to determine outcomes. It is because they are looking into a future that isn’t certain and they can’t identify what it is they want. An easy way to get around this is to imagine that the outcome has already been achieved and then to describe what it looks like. Going back to the situation with the meeting planner, the question that I asked her was, Let’s assume it is six months after the conference and you know that it was a huge success. What would have happened to let you know that it was successful? People are much more able to describe the past then they are to identify an unknown future. By asking the question this way, I was able to find out that according to the planner, the criterion for a successful meeting was that the attendees would have the tools they needed to be able to more easily and effectively handle the many changes that were going on in their industry. When I discovered this outcome, I was able to suggest a program that would help the organization achieve this desired result.

Before you take action (small or large), you need to identify what your outcome is what do you want to achieve? When you do that, you will cut down your time, streamline your efforts, accelerate your progress, and reach your desired goal. When you know where you are going, there is a good chance that you will end up getting there.

Goal setting activities are crucial when you are deciding what you want your life to become many years from now. Two of the benefits you will receive as a result of defining and setting major goals in life are peace of mind and focus.

Here are some of the goal setting activities that are of importance.

1. Use your mind and talents fully. Maximize what has been given you. If you are aware that you are capable of things that other people are not, make it work to your advantage.

2. Have more purpose and direction in life. Believe it or not, there are many people who only discover what they want in life in later years. Think of all the time that was wasted. It is important to have specific goals early on in life to be able to have more time to work on them and bring them into reality.

3. Make better decisions. Do not be hasty in whatever endeavors you encounter in life. Not all things have to be decided on instantly. Think fully before making any decision that you might regret later on.

4. Be more organized and effective. Take note that not all people who are always rushing things and on the go are the most effective people. There are other considerations in life that have to be neatly planned to have an effective result. Sit down for a moment and make a schedule or plan.

5. Do more for yourself and others. Too much and too less of giving and taking is not always good. There are times when we have to balance these factors. Know which one needs your attention more, yourself or others? Although it is not always a problem, you have to have equal time set for both.

6. Have greater confidence and self-worth. One of the greatest threats that can pull you down is lack of self-confidence and self-worth. If you do not have that belief in yourself, why should others put their faith in you? Other people that are lacking in talent and resources can get through by oozing self-confidence to help them pursue their goals.

7. Feel more fulfilled. Be happy with the simple things that you have attained in a day. Do not set aside small victories as something that are worthless. All achievements should make you feel proud. Pat yourself on the back once in awhile when achieving these seemingly insignificant victories.

8. Be more enthusiastic and motivated. Face each day as a day different from the last. Try to make each day a work of art, a masterpiece.

9. Accomplish uncommon projects. Nothing can compare with the feeling when you have done something that few others have. Try to be successful in things that other people are shying away from.

10. Always want more. Do not be satisfied with what you have. Try to get more out of life.

Once you have completed one goal, be sure to replace it with something else. Goal setting achievements are a life-long process. You have all the time in the world to do what you want. This way you will always reap the benefits of what your goal settings has provided.

Do you have a dream, but keep postponing it because you feel trapped by the responsibilities of life? Want to be a writer, work from home, own your own business? First, we will examine how your dream got deferred. Then, we will outline definitive steps to get you back on track.

How did I get to this point in my life? Many of us look back and realize if we had it to do again, we would do some things differently. As the owner of a staffing agency for the last seven years, I have developed a theory.

In my opinion, many people fall into a job. Most accept the first decent paying position out of school. If it’s not something they’re particularly crazy about, they surmise they’ll take this until they figure out what it is they really want to do.

Usually, the demanding responsibilities of rent, student loans, credit cards, etc. take over, making it hard to focus on what they really want to do. After 3, 5, 7 years in a field, it becomes more difficult to move into a different area because it often means a salary cut. At this point, however, a salary cut is often out of the question because of the above-mentioned responsibilities. It evolves into a vicious cycle.

So, how do you break the cycle? The guidelines outlined below will put you well on your way to achieving your dreams. Some of this advice will fly in the face of what you have been told all your life. It’s up to you to decide if your dream is important enough to accept it.

1. Make your dream one of your top three priorities. The mistake many make is putting their dreams on the back burner, eg, I’ll focus on [you fill in the blank], when the kids graduate from high school, when I pay off that student loan, once I get that promotion, etc.

There will always be something that can get in the way, if you let it. If you really want to be a writer, work from home, own your own business, travel more, whatever it is, you have to make it a priority. Otherwise it will always remain just that, a dream.

2. Manage debt. Massive debt limits the ability to make life changes.

Most people are forced into having to make a certain salary because they’ve become accustomed to a certain lifestyle. Let’s face it, most of us work to live. Our lives dictate to us, not the other way around.

Look at all the pressing demands in your life. Outside of keeping a roof over your head, putting food on the table, saving for retirement and health insurance, how many obligations can you cut back on?

I personally do not believe that parents owe children an education. It’s nice if you can help out, but you don’t have to outright pay for it. Cut back on the college fund, outright buy a car instead of making payments, eat out less, and really, how many white shirts does one need – cut the shopping.

I live in New York City, one of the most expensive cities in the world. Yet, in the last seven years, I’ve managed to build two businesses, work from home and basically plan my days to suit my needs, instead of having them planned for me.

New Yorkers have a running joke that you spend $20 just walking out the front door – and it’s practically true.

There are street vendors who sell the most beautiful baubles: jewelry, African art, sunglasses, shirts, books, CDs (the illegal ones of excellent quality for $5!); restaurants and coffee bars litter almost every corner; oh-so-convenient bodegas; and we won’t talk about the large Salvation Army in my neighborhood that should be renamed in my honor.

In spite of all this temptation right out my door, I rarely spend $5 during the week – really! How do I manage? Two things help: 1) I grocery shop once a week and once a week only; and 2) I use my ATM card once a week to take out cash for the weekend on Fridays (margaritas with my friends is almost a ritual!). No exceptions.

I guarantee you, if you start making your dream one of your main priorities, you’d be amazed at how what you can do to achieve it.

3. Invest and save: Start a dream fund. Securing your dream is not about how much you make, but how much you save.

If you want to work from home, start planning and saving for it now. Most wait until they are so fed up with a current situation that they find themselves doing something drastic out of sheer frustration.

You will have a much better chance at success if you slowly and methodically start to plan months or years in advance. This will give you a chance to start freelancing and pick up clients while you are working full-time; pay down debts, save more aggressively, buy needed equipment, etc.

Starting early has another benefit as well. You will become calmer inside because you are doing something toward your dream. This will make your current situation more tolerable. In almost any given situation, taking positive action almost always makes you feel better.

So, although you may not be able to live your dream right away, taking these steps will allow you to start realizing it today!

When the worst happens to your computer and all your files disappear, never worry! There are a number of quality data recovery companies that are able to restore your critical files quickly and easily.

Instead of tearing out your hair over a stubborn computer that is holding that essential file hostage, let the worries slide away and send off your hard drive to a data recovery company. These companies work their magic and recover files of all sizes in a remarkably quick turn around time. This service is essential for any individual or business that has fallen onto hard times with their computer.

Most data recovery companies operate over the internet and occupy cyberspace as they would a store front. If you find yourself in need of a quality company to find your files, look no further than the World Wide Web.

A simple search of search engines will produce hundreds of quality companies eager to solve your every problem. Before you send off your hard drive, carefully evaluate the chosen company to ensure it is legitimate and reputable. Using an incorrect company may result in further headaches and a loss of money for services not rendered.

Upon your search for a data recovery company, investigate their capabilities and services. Choosing a company that will best serve your needs will ensure the greater success in the end. You may need to compare services versus charges for these data recovery companies.

The old adage, “you get what you pay for” could not be truer when it comes to regaining your lost files. If you are taking the trouble to send off your hard drive in an attempt to reclaim critical files for business or personal reasons, then you should be prepared to spend the appropriate amount of money to get the job done. However, just because one data recovery is more expensive than another one does not mean the pricier company is more successful.

When choosing a data recovery company to reclaim your files, consider contacting individuals who has used their services in the past. This recommendation to use or to avoid the company may be an excellent method to choosing a company.

Also, contact the company directly and explain your specific situation. A representative for the company will be able to discuss the possibility of the recovery of your files and the estimated cost of their services. You should be sure to inquire the expense if the company is unable to recover the lost files. Many companies offer to return your hard drive without charging for their services if they are unable to deliver your compromised files.

Whichever data recovery company you entrust to regain your lost files, be sure to keep the company’s contact information if you are pleased with the services rendered. Having this resource can be invaluable if a similar fate befalls your files in the future and you need a reputable source to recover these files as quickly as possible. If you are pleased with the data recovery company, be sure to tell other individuals in your predicament.

The alcoholic anonymous groups are out there to help people that realize that they have a problem with the drinking that they are doing. If you find that you are in need of a little help with the drinking you are going to want to say to yourself that you need help and then contact one of the alcoholic anonymous groups in your area. If you try to go to a alcoholic anonymous group with out facing the fact that you have a drinking problem you are not going to be able to receive the help that they will offer you because you do no think that you have a problem in the back of your mind even though you went to one or two of the alcoholic anonymous meetings.

If you have been ordered by the court to go to an alcoholic anonymous meeting for being caught drunk in public or even driving a vehicle you will not actually get much help from them because you did not come to the realization that you have a problem with drinking. You will actually just be wasting the time of the alcoholic anonymous group that is actually trying to help you out because you think that you do not have a problem with your drinking. You may do your time at the alcoholic anonymous group but you really did not get anything out of it in the end of your time served.

When you see that you are hurting your family and friends because of all the drinking that you are doing and are really ready to get some help for it you will want to make sure that you are getting in contact with one of the alcoholic anonymous groups so that you are going to be able to get the help that you want. However, you need to take the first step in realizing that you have a problem and that you need help to get thru it. If you take the first step then you will be able to get thru the program that the alcoholic anonymous groups will be able to provide to you for help.

When you are in an alcoholic anonymous program you are going to want to make sure that you doing what they suggest to you and even keep in contact with your group at all times. Even if you see that you are having a tough time at a gathering take time to call your sponsor so that they are able to help, you get thru the time at the gathering without a drink or you may end up with the same old drinking problem again. If you think about it, the alcoholic anonymous group is only going to be able to help those that are willing to receive the help that they are offering.

Ever wondered how some people have everything that the dream of and for many it just remains a dream? Here are some tips on how to help turn your dreams into reality. Fortunately, it’s not a question of genetics or luck; it’s down to the thinking strategies that we use.

Understanding what is important to us. Craft goals in line with our values.

If a goal is in line with our values we get energy and motivation that lead us toward the goal. Most of us have experienced this type of energy and motivation at some time in our lives; maybe Birthdays and Christmas as Children and as Adults buying a house, getting married or looking forward to a holiday in the sun.

The curious thing is how little we target the use of this behaviour towards things that we want in life. It’s because we spend little time working on making our goals fit that we have such a high failure rate at achieving them.

I’m sure you’ve set New Years resolutions. How many of those did you achieve? What was different, I wonder, between those that you did achieve and those that you didn’t? I suspect that for those that you did not achieve, beneath the reason for not doing so, the cost in terms of time, money or loss of something else was too high.

If we have a greater understanding of our values, craft our goals in line with them, and address some the other key areas listed here, we are rewarded with the energy and motivation to make them happen – with ease.

Optimise the use of our time.

To optimise our time on and towards what we want we must first gain a greater insight into what is important to us, and having done so we must then distinguish between the activities that we do that are important and urgent.

In my experience this is not a regularly practiced technique; too many people are reacting, reacting to activities that are asked of them or are left to the point of being urgent. Examples of this are leaving the utilities bills to the last minute or working under a demanding boss or chaotic organisation.

Once understood this essential time management technique is easy to master and is commonly taught in time management programmes. Understanding it within a great context of achievement makes it that much more relevant to learning and putting into practice.

Start with what you have now, with the end in mind

Having both established goals that are in line with your and optimised your time, you need to make a start. It’s important that the start is made with the goal in mind and with a degree of realism on the resources that are available now. Delusion is the result of setting off without a realistic view of what the present situation is. And Delusion soon turns to disappointment which in turn turns to frustration and ultimately little or no significant progress.

At the end of the day we only have 3 resources: Physical and mental energy, time and money. It’s key that we learn how to make optimal use of these resources.

Meeting challenges
No amount of planning is going to cater for every eventuality. Many people consider these unplanned events to be problems that prevent progress and give up at that point. People that achieve are not put off by these events and are more energised by the richness of the opportunities that are enveloped in these events.

With the right mindset the journey to achievement can be viewed as one opportunity after another to reinforce the ability to succeed.

How we use our imaginations

All human beings are blessed with incredibly powerful imaginations. However many imagine outcomes of the future that are not going to be to their advantage. Imagining negative outcomes leads to worry, stress and fear and drains our energy and motivation.

Imagining a positive outcome of the future releases more of the energy and motivation that we need to succeed at our goals.

Fortunately the structure that we use in our minds is the same for both negative and positive imaginations. And with the right know how one can use the skill that generates fear into one that generates excitement and anticipation.

Forming our goals well

When forming our goals it is essential that we consider a number of factors; a compelling view of how things will be when we have the goal is as important as a clear understanding of what we will lose when we have it. Many times the likely loss prevents us from achieving what we want because we have not adapted our thinking around the loss.

A prime example of this is giving us smoking – many people fail to give up because having a cigarette provides them with a valuable 5 minute break. When the break is factored into the future along with the goal the chances of success are considerably increased.

Believing that it is possible that that it is for us

It is important that we hold certain helpful beliefs about the goal. Many people hold negative beliefs about whether the goal is achievable, whether they will ever achieve it and even whether it is really for them.

It is important to overcome these beliefs or sabotage will result.

Fortunately we are not born with our beliefs and the ones that we develop through childhood and in to the present moment can be changed.

Some of my clients have come to me feeling like their worlds were not under their own control. They felt as though everyone else ran their lives and had some aspect of control in everything that they did. I asked them to note some specific situations in which they felt this way and how they felt out of control of the situation. It’s interesting to note that in every circumstance, there was some aspect of guilt or second-guessing involved. Indeed, these are the purest signs of self-relinquished control.

There are many ways that people can feel loss of control in their lives. We can lose control through frustration and burn-out, living in a rut, stagnation, illness, change, and trauma. However, one of the most common is unconsciously giving up control to others. This is an unconscious act involving two or more parties where party A literally hands over the reins to party B.

At one time, parental voices controlled and molded our lives. These are the voices and rules provided by authority, family, and friends from whom our core belief systems evolved. However, some external influences and people can re-engage that basic instinct for seeking parental acceptance simply by imposing doubt into your world. By accepting the guilt or self-doubt imposed by others, you begin to live in someone else’s context. You surrender your own belief systems and adopt those of the other party. In doing so, you begin to live by the rules and controls of the other person.

One of the more common areas in which this occurs is in a professional or group setting where power and control are part of the environment. Many politically savvy individuals ( A ) will take control of others ( B ) simply by learning their ways, gaining their trust, and then embedding doubt or a feeling of non-acceptance. In this way, A is now subconsciously seen as the parental figure and B requires acceptance from A. A is now in control of B. Over time, B grows to feel animosity towards A, but is usually unsure why except for the fact that B doesn’t like the way that A treats them.

Once you fall into this situation, it is difficult to break free. You have to go through and undo the web of emotions and doubt that now clouds your thinking. However, you have to realize that it’s not so much how A treats you as it is how you feel about your view of their treatment. By separating your ego and emotions from the situation, you are better able to break free from the reins of self-relinquished control. But, it’s not so much that they have explicit control over you as it is that you are merely seeking their acceptance. It’s an interesting situation to observe!

The best way to prevent such situations from occurring is to go through your own psyche and find out which parental voices are still present and dislodge them. You need to replace the old, worn out parental triggers with your own rules for your evolving belief systems. Of course, we usually just leave these voices where they are out of comfort and because they seem to work. However, these are triggers that can be tripped to cause us to fall into this loss-of-control scenario.

I recall one young man who, once he finished college, simply hung out in a local pub. He could not figure out what to do with his life. His parents had passed on, he had no other relatives around, so he just waited for anyone and anything that tripped his triggers. Because of this, he ended up in trouble from time to time because he was easily misled by people who gave him what he wanted — acceptance and direction. After much work and planning, he began to move forward in his life and is slowly becoming a success in his own right. But, as you can see, these types of situations are very common and can occur just about anytime to anyone. I’ve also seen such issues occur with abused women, corporations, and myriad other inter-personal situations. People tend to sit and wait for acceptance and guidance from others because they relinquished control.

Live your own life by replacing these triggers with your own rules for living. You will never obtain acceptance from everyone as the rest of the world is out seeking acceptance as well. It’s a never-ending cycle! Learn to accept yourself as, in the long run, you are the only person who has a stake in your own decisions and endeavors for a self-fulfilling life.

If you have ever set goals before, but failed to achieve them, it may have been because you did not create a specific plan of action to accomplish those goals.

Taking the time to set goals is only part of the process of goal setting, and many people often overlook the other part, creating a plan!

Without a plan your goals remain incomplete. It’s like having a destination but without a map. Your goals tell you where you want to go in life, and your plan tells you how to get there.

A goal plan is simply a list of scheduled activities that you will do sometime in the future. These may include activities done over a series of days, weeks, months or even years depending on the type of goal you set for yourself.

Your plan does not have to be completed perfectly the first time. Usually you will find that your first attempt at creating a goal plan will be vague and incomplete. Don’t worry this is ok. Plans should be flexible and so are likely to be constantly updated as you move towards completing your primary goal.

In your plan you should therefore create a series of steps, you think you need in order to accomplish that goal. So think of it like baking a cake. Your ultimate goal is to make a cake (and eat it!), but the ingredients and the things you do with those ingredients are your plan. Once you complete the plan, you complete your goal.

Creating a goal plan is frequently overlooked, and many people discipline themselves to write their goals every day but create no plan! So make sure you take the time to decide where you want to go (your goals) and then create a plan that will tell you how to get there!

In addition to your goal plan it is also a good idea to use visualization to help clarify in your mind exactly what you want to achieve. This can simply involve thinking about your goals, and imaging them as completed when you go to bed. You can do this for about 10 minutes (or longer if you want) before you fall to sleep, and you will be surprised at what a difference it makes in achieving your goals. One of the main reasons visualization before sleep is so effective, is that it provides easy access to the subconscious mind. Thereby allowing you to program your goals into your mind, increasing the likelihood you will accomplish them.

The Hasidic master, Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach taught that on Passover night we are bringing our entire life stories to the Seder table to be freed. What exactly does this mean? To begin with, we are by nature, storytellers. Whether we are aware of it or not, we live in a world of stories. Stories that we tell our family, friends, coworkers, and clients. Stories we share over the phone, e-mail, in our journals and the stories that are constantly playing themselves out in our heads. Stories about what’s happening to those we love, stories about those we despise, stories that inspire the spirit, and stories that instill fear.

The sum and total of our life is that, from our birth until our death, we are walking stories, here upon the earth. Yet on Passover, it’s the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves that needs to be looked at and freed. The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves have great power over us. Depending on how they are told, our life stories can either enlighten or mislead, inspire or discourage.

A good exercise for this Passover is to become more aware of the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves and our past. What are the underlying themes of our stories?

Victory? Betrayal? Struggle? Victimization? Each of us has had key events in our pasts, whether it be from our childhood, or more recent episodes of hurt and loss, where a part of us draws a reactionary conclusion about our life stories — even when the conclusions are terribly incorrect. Many perpetuate these stories and our immature understandings of them often make a further mess of our lives in the process – unless a reminder comes to wake us up and reorient our perspective. Our Hebrew Sages teach that Passover is such a reminder.

Passover is a reminder that we need not live in our Egypts forever. There is a G-d, a Higher Power, that has an invested interest in our Liberation. Our job comes in our willingness to understand, heal and ultimately elevate the stories we hold onto that are no longer working for us. After all, it does clearly state in the Haggadah, “In every generation a person is obligated to see themselves, as if they themselves left Egypt”. What are we doing to leave THIS year?

We can simply begin by looking at our life stories and revising parts of the script. Remember, it’s not what happened to us that’s important but what we make of those events.

The following suggestions are designed to help us tell our stories well this year:

Become a Sympathetic Narrator

When telling your story about yourself, to yourself, become a sympathetic narrator.

In literature, a sympathetic narrator is one who takes the side of the story’s protagonist or main character. For example, when the Torah introduces the life of King David, it includes his shortcomings, yet does not let it take away from his greatness. Similarly, we need to admit mistakes yet not obsess over them. A sympathetic narrator casts daily failures as learning experiences, painful yet helpful steps on the way to success.

Choose What You Want to Emphasize

Any honest reporter will tell you that all stories have a slant. It’s not that reporters try to mislead, it’s just that in choosing what to cover, some things are always left out or minimized in order to create a perspective. And that’s OK. Likewise, in our own stories of loss or pain, deciding what to highlight can bring about the difference between lingering bitterness and a sense of closure.

Seek the Higher Purpose

There is a core spiritual principle that our lives are divinely designed for each one of us to get exactly what we need to support our own soul’s unique evolutionary process. As the Baal Shem Tov taught, “You are exactly where you need to be”, which implies that we should not get too caught up in our internal struggles against what is, or what was, which will only lead to more pain and suffering. According to this spiritual belief, nothing in our world occurs by accident and there are no coincidences, only synchronicity. When reframing our life stories, attempt to see the “Hand of G-d” or the pattern of events that have led us to this moment. These patterns of connectedness or synchronicity are the magical language of the Divine in our lives. When rewriting our stories, seek to see beyond the circumstances and instead at the Divine Order of the unique paths that have chosen us.

As for the Life Story that still plays itself out today:

Work on the 20 Percent

While it is not commonly known, according to the Midrash, when Moses left Egypt, only 20 percent of the nation of Israel left with him. The other 80 percent remained behind, and did not succeed in taking the risk of leaving an imprisonment that was all too familiar to them. An interesting correlation is found in the meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous and other recovery groups where the statistic is the same. It is known that only 20 percent of those in recovery will remain sober, the other 80 percent will inevitably relapse into old behavior as statistics have shown, because the life of addiction, no matter how painful and dark, is at least familiar.

Consequently, when we say we want to change our life stories, the important thing to remember is not whether we feel 100 percent confident and ready. The more realistic question to ask ourselves today is whether we still have a least 20 percent of ourselves that is strong enough to take the steps, and if we can agree to work on that 20 percent that is committed and willing. Passover asks us to at least look for that part, to find that part, and to work on that part, for it is there that we might find the secret of finding the life we want and deserve to live.